Honoring the Space Between

Zendalannette R. Thomas
3 days ago
4 min read

“The deepest love we’ll ever experience is the one we learn to give ourselves—first, fully, and without condition. Everything else flows from there.” — Zendalannette, Reiki Master, Author, Wellness & Well-BEing Architect

Happy May, Beautiful Soul! 🌸

There’s a sacred stillness that arises when you begin to feel, truly feel what unconditional love tastes like. Not the kind we perform to gain approval or barter in exchange for validation. But the kind that begins within. The kind that reaches inward to embrace the parts of ourselves that once felt unseen, unloved, or unworthy—and whispers:

“You are safe. You are whole. You are worthy of love… just as you are.”

This season, I find myself anchored in that kind of love.

I’m experiencing what true, deep, unconditional love feels like. From a space of deep unhappiness in my marriage, where I wasn’t sure I even wanted to stay, to the realization that what I felt was a mirror reflecting my own disconnection from self.

The version of me who appeared polished and put together was, internally, fragmented.

Writing my first three books was a divine catalyst. Each became a sacred portal for healing, evolution, and reflection, offering me the space to sit with and nurture Little Zendalannette. To comfort her. To fortify her. To give her permission to grow, to be seen, to be loved.

And as I’ve healed within, I’ve learned to love my husband with greater depth and fewer conditions. Not from the lens of my wounded self, who once believed he needed to change for me to feel safe… But from the knowing that he, too, has an inner child—Little Mario—who deserves compassion, grace, and nurturing.

That realization changed everything.

On May 15th, we celebrated our 26th wedding anniversary. This milestone, while sacred and personal, is also a testament to our mutual commitment to doing the work, to healing and evolving individually and together.

Through the wisdom of Imago Therapy and the teachings of Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D., we’ve been navigating a 12-week journey. We’re currently in Week 8, and every day we recommit to ourselves, to each other, and to the space between us.

In my books and workshops, I often say:

"Loving others is complicated when we haven’t learned to love ourselves."

If we are bitter, broken, or battling with our own worth, it’s nearly impossible to offer authentic love. This is why I share, often and without apology:

“BE the First To Put You 1st… In All Ways & Always.”

When you love yourself first, fully and unapologetically, you radiate authenticity. And in that sacred frequency, love evolves. It matures. It becomes agape—the unconditional love that grows in the space between.

As I traverse the second half of 2025, I’ve found myself in powerful conversations with women—some divorced, some on the edge. What echoes through our stories is a yearning to be seen, heard, and appreciated. And for many, it’s not about leaving—it’s about healing right where they are.

And that healing always starts within.

The biggest lesson? When we surrender ego—gently guiding it to the back row of the orchestra—we open ourselves to love in its truest form.

So, this May, I sit in deep gratitude. Grateful for my husband. Grateful for the man he is and the healing he’s choosing—day by day.

One practice I’ll share from our journey: When tension arises… PAUSE.

Close your eyes.
Visualize hugging the inner child of your partner.
Offer a silent prayer.

And remind yourself: it’s often the wounded child within that just wants to be seen.

This sacred practice, paired with:

The Four Agreements
The Five Reiki Principles
And my own 3-PAUSE Self-Check-In (from The Audacity To BE...) … has become our rhythm of renewal.

This isn’t a story of perfection. It’s a story of intention. Of showing up—moment by moment—and choosing love. First within. Then outward.

As I continue to evolve, I’m reminded that the love we seek from others must begin within. Our inner child still longs to be seen, held, and honored.

So, Beautiful Soul…

💫 What parts of your inner child are asking to be nurtured right now?

💫 How are you choosing to Get the Love You Want—with yourself and in your relationships?

✍🏽 Take a moment to journal, reflect, or share in the comments below. Let what rises do so gently, with grace.

Because the journey to love—real, lasting, soul-deep love—begins within. And when we choose to love ourselves fully, we create space for the kind of love that heals, honors, and evolves with us.

🌿 Join Us for Women in Wellness: Retreat by Design

Ready to make space for your own transformation?

Secure your sacred space for our upcoming immersive experience—Women in Wellness: Retreat by Design—curated with love and intention by Zendalannette, Nyrie Cornelius, and Erika Brown. This retreat is a call to ReleaZe, Replenish, and Reclaim the fullness of who you are.